(Excerpted from James Hollis' book - Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life.)
Depression can be biologically or reactively based.
Biologically based depression slides in and out of family history usually treated by medication and peppered with therapy sessions.
Reactive depression on the other hand signifies a loss in our lives with varying intensity depending on the amount of energy invested on what/who was lost.
Grieving is an honest affirmation of the value of the original investment of energy. No grief, no true investment occurred.
Depression invites us to question/examine where we may have overinvested in that other that was lost.
When the energy returns it is our responsibility to carry it and invest on ways that the soul desires.
When a relationship leaves us, for instance, 'Empty nest syndrome',(that is children leaving home), we may grief the loss that comes with it, yet we are responsible for whatever aspects of our personality that relationship was asked to carry.
When children leave home, they should be empowered to do so, clinging onto them reveals our emotional dependencies.
Grieving the loss of an intimate relationship is to celebrate what was received as a gift, but may also raise the question on what we were asking of the other.
The only way out of a depression is through it, asking not what the ego desires but rather what the soul wants!